I got the idea to write this blog from a hilarious blog I read over the summer while I was teaching in Vienna. This blog, http://www.hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/ is easily one of the funniest blogs I’ve ever laid eyes on. The author is one of my new personal heroes.
I realized after I started teaching that you just can’t make some of the shit up that happens in the classroom even if you wanted to, and somebody needs to write about this stuff. Kids are total dicks sometimes and all you can do most of the time is laugh about it. So, I hope anyone reading this can find some humor in my anguish.
I have also recently been talking to a very good friend about starting my own blog after several days of bitching to him about how fucked up kids can be sometimes. In my mini bitch sessions, I came to realize that it’s no longer frustrating when you’re telling someone else about it, it becomes funny because it’s so ridiculous.
The name of this post came from a ridiculous story I made up while driving in my car with my best friend, who will be called, Waltraud (this isn’t her real name, but in a google search for weird names that start with “W”, this was my favorite. You know who you are), about two weeks before I actually started teaching. My mom had given me this little good luck charm in the form of a pig with three legs. It’s supposed to be good luck because it only has three legs, but can still stand up on it’s own. I told Waltraud, excitedly, “I’m going to put this little guy on my desk for good luck when I start teaching.” Then I got to thinking.... “wait a minute, kids are thieves. It’s only a matter of time before one of those little assholes decides it’ll be funny to take the little pig from my desk.” So, I started scheming out loud to Waltraud about how I would booby trap the pig on my desk so that if and when said student tried to thief the pig from my desk, navy blue ink would squirt him in the face and BAM! Busted, Rafael! Game over. I’m going to make your life miserable now that I know what kind of person you are. From now on, everything that goes wrong in the classroom will be blamed on little Rafael. Waltraud and I started laughing hysterically at the idea and I have never been able to let poor, imaginary Rafael off the hook. Why did I blurt out the name Rafael? No idea. I obviously used to love the ninja turtles and felt I needed to bring them back. So, this blog will mostly be about all the little Rafaels' in my classroom and how they endlessly entertain me with their shitty little attitudes from time to time.
I realized after I started teaching that you just can’t make some of the shit up that happens in the classroom even if you wanted to, and somebody needs to write about this stuff. Kids are total dicks sometimes and all you can do most of the time is laugh about it. So, I hope anyone reading this can find some humor in my anguish.
I have also recently been talking to a very good friend about starting my own blog after several days of bitching to him about how fucked up kids can be sometimes. In my mini bitch sessions, I came to realize that it’s no longer frustrating when you’re telling someone else about it, it becomes funny because it’s so ridiculous.
The name of this post came from a ridiculous story I made up while driving in my car with my best friend, who will be called, Waltraud (this isn’t her real name, but in a google search for weird names that start with “W”, this was my favorite. You know who you are), about two weeks before I actually started teaching. My mom had given me this little good luck charm in the form of a pig with three legs. It’s supposed to be good luck because it only has three legs, but can still stand up on it’s own. I told Waltraud, excitedly, “I’m going to put this little guy on my desk for good luck when I start teaching.” Then I got to thinking.... “wait a minute, kids are thieves. It’s only a matter of time before one of those little assholes decides it’ll be funny to take the little pig from my desk.” So, I started scheming out loud to Waltraud about how I would booby trap the pig on my desk so that if and when said student tried to thief the pig from my desk, navy blue ink would squirt him in the face and BAM! Busted, Rafael! Game over. I’m going to make your life miserable now that I know what kind of person you are. From now on, everything that goes wrong in the classroom will be blamed on little Rafael. Waltraud and I started laughing hysterically at the idea and I have never been able to let poor, imaginary Rafael off the hook. Why did I blurt out the name Rafael? No idea. I obviously used to love the ninja turtles and felt I needed to bring them back. So, this blog will mostly be about all the little Rafaels' in my classroom and how they endlessly entertain me with their shitty little attitudes from time to time.